The Yummy Mummies Survival Guide 3.0

This addition of The Yummy Mummies Survival Guide has been inspired by ‘Home Start’ and our visits to their local groups this week.  We want this blog to be an inspiration and source of information specifically for mums with children under the age of 5 years, however we know the advice and suggestions will be helpful for any mum with children of any ages.  At the time of writing this Stacey is a mum to Sonny who is 12 and Hannah is a mum to Alfie who is 2 whilst also being 13 weeks pregnant with her 2nd child.  We share this information with you so you know that, although we are here giving advice to help you, we are also just like you too.  We are mums and we know how hard this role can be.  We understand the struggle and we have bad days just as much as anyone else.  We are however blessed to have each other and the business that we have built together.  We have both experienced low days, we have both experienced isolation, we both have insecurities and we both have our own unique issues.  Some days we think we are going mad and some days we think we are the best mums ever, however what is most important than anything is that EVERYDAY we know we have a community of support that helps us through, and we want you to have the same.  It has always been our goal to build an army of women who empower and support each other through every struggle and every success.  This is what we have now built and what we now want to share with you.  We want you to know you are not alone and that with the right tools, support and guidance, you can learn how to be the happiest and healthiest version of yourself.

If you have read the previous versions of this guide, we hope you will have some of the tools you need to take some positive steps forward.  We would now like to share some additional tips which we think are relevant to the mums out there with young children and the specific struggles you might be dealing with.  So here we go…

1 – Take Your Power Back by focusing on what you can control and letting go of the things you can’t!

Becoming a mum forces you into a world where you have little control over what happens next.  Although this is true in all areas of life, its certainly highlighted more when you have an unpredictable human that you are now in charge of.  Anyone who has made a birthing plan that didn’t go to plan will know this unpredictability can start from the moment you get the first contraction and often extends into the first few years of life as a mother.  We can become very disappointed and overwhelmed with the combination of responsibility and the unknown.  We can become focused on trying to control the uncontrollable and feel very frustrated when things don’t go our way.  There was a time that we were super organised, on time and care free and we can pine for the life we once had.  We can try to keep things the same and put a lot of pressure on ourselves but today we want you to let that go. 

You can’t control people (including your child), the weather, rising prices, unfair systems, sleepless nights, your past or your future.  The only thing you truly have control over is what YOU choose to do with YOUR body and mind NOW.  Wasting energy complaining and getting frustrated with the situations around you is only going to add to your load.  Let the past go, let the people who do not treat you well go, let the worry for the future go and feel the weight of those burdens be released from your shoulders as soon you do.  This process can take time and you might need some additional help, however the freedom that comes from letting go of what you can’t control is a priceless gift that you will be truly grateful for every day.  You may have had some of your choices taken away from you when you became a mum but there are many that remain.  You can choose what you put in your body, what you listen to, who you surround yourself with and what you fill your day with.  If you sit around and wait for things to be different or for people to be different then they will have your power and can dictate your happiness.  Choose to take your power back and focus on your CANS….let go of the CANTS.

2 – Your body has changed and that’s ok!

From the moment we were born we were gifted with a unique body like no one else’s.  Although this is the case, nothing can prepare us for the changes our bodies go through when growing a human and then bringing it into this world.   Learning to love and accept the new body we are left with after this process can be long, hard and in some cases a lost cause.  The pressure to ‘bounce back’ and be like the people in the mummy magazines can be overwhelming and unrealistic.  As previously stated, we all have a unique body and none of us are supposed to be the same so why are we trying to be?  We can be so focused on getting back into shape and hating our wobbly bits that we forget to recognise the incredible miracle that we have been gifted with.  For every stretch mark we hate on and every new bump or saggy boob we look at with sadness there is a women out there who wishes she had them all.  As hard as it can be we want you to remind yourself of the miracle you have created and how much love we should all have for the bodies that allowed us to do it.  By giving your new body love and acceptance, you will automatically treat it with more respect and care then you did when you were hating on it and trying to change it.  Maybe your stretch marks will fade and maybe you will loose weight and get back into your jeans but unless you learn to love and accept your body along the way, these changes will not make you feel any better.  You will still be focused on the things you don’t like and you will still find something to be critical about.  You will continue to compare yourself to others and you will still be disconnected from your own body.  By giving thanks, focusing on the good and treating your body with love and respect without trying to be anyone else, you will learn to love the skin you are in and celebrate the uniqueness you have been gifted with.  Don’t compare yourself to others….no one can ever do a better job of being you then YOU!!

3 – Do what you love, love what you do.

When people think about exercise or getting in shape they can quite quickly turn their back on it and say that its not for them!  Maybe you weren’t the sporty type at school and maybe you always found it awkward and embarrassing.  Some of you may have enjoyed it at school but left it behind you when adulthood came.  Maybe you loved fitness before children but now find that you barely have the energy to clean the house let alone hit the gym!  For some fitness is something we only consider when we want to lose weight and its seen as a chore or something that needs to be hard work and unenjoyable.  Whatever your situation or views are on fitness we are here to tell you that its not only your right to be active but it is an essential part of your overall wellbeing.  It is also the most underutilised anti-depressant out there and should be part of your weekly routine regardless of what is going on.  The main barriers that we see when people don’t stay active is 1; people think you have to be fit to do fitness and 2; they don’t know all their options.  There is a whole world of options out there to get active and you don’t have to be any shape or size to get started.  Outside influences such as the media and magazines etc may have made you feel this way in the past but we are here to help you see it differently and give you the opportunity to try it out.   Our message is simple; if you don’t like it then don’t do it…keep trying until you find something you do. We know many people who didn’t consider themselves ‘runners’ but this year have collected a number of medals from various races they have attended.  We also know people who turned their back on yoga cause ‘they didn’t feel like it was a workout’, but have now found and benefitted from all the positives that come from learning to breath and hold their bodies in ways they didn’t previously think were possible. 

It doesn’t matter if you dance to your favourite music with glow sticks or choose to take a walk in nature each day.  As long as you are moving and smiling, that’s all that matters.  Meeting people, making friendships and learning to enjoy the process are the important parts of fitness.  The size of the weight you can lift or what clothes you’re wearing are not!

With this recommendation we simple want you to explore your options and to focus on what you CAN do and what you really enjoy.  If you hate hiit workouts then go for a swim.  If you dislike solo swims then join an aqua class.  Don’t listen to anyone who tells you there is ONE WAY, go out and find YOUR WAY.  Exercise is different for every person and is something that should be ENJOYED.  Go out and find your thing!!

We hope you have found this information helpful.  These recommendations have helped us and all who work with us within The Feel Fabulous Project.  If you would like to discuss any of them in more detail or you would like to attend one of our events for FREE then please get in touch.  We want to take this opportunity to thank you for taking the time to read our thoughts and hope you know that our door is always open. 

Lots of Love

Hannah and Stacey x x

The Feel Fabulous Project

Helping Mums Find Themselves Again

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  • Alison

    March 6, 2020 at 1:39 pm

    I'm keen to get fitter so would love to try out one of your groups for free, please. A colleague of mine recommended I contact […] Read MoreI'm keen to get fitter so would love to try out one of your groups for free, please. A colleague of mine recommended I contact you - it all sounds great! If you need to give me a call to discuss, my number is 07761 987787 Read Less

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